Fugitivus Discussion Forum

That is really well written, Eli. I'm glad you did this.

I found that note very inspiring, Eli.

Just posted it. I hope people take me up on the offer to talk to me in person.

That is really cool, Eli! Hopefully other people around there will see it and find it encouraging too.

Oops, wrong thread!

I'm not sure if this really classifies as ableism, but yesterday I was very disappointed in my fellow book club members. They're otherwise very lovely people, but yesterday they were discussing the newest member's trigger response to a book that was read in a less than respectful fashion. I don't think they were being intentionally malicious, but they really seemed to think it was "odd".

I finally resolved to write a letter to the group leader:

"I wasn't able to say this during our book club meeting, because it's such a touchy subject, so I'm going to say it in text: I'm really uncomfortable about the way the newcomer's triggered response was discussed.

Like I said, I've had many friends who have been through rape, child abuse, and spousal abuse, and as a result there are things that will trigger them. I think we owe it to survivors to take their justified responses to trauma seriously, without calling them "crazy" or even the milder "unusual".

I have my own reservations about this woman, but I think our discussion of her "unusualness" bordered on bullying, even though I'm sure you and D certainly didn't mean it that way. I know you, and you're one of the nicest people I've known, so I know there was nothing malicious in your intent, but I think sometimes even the nicest people can be unintentionally cruel because there aren't enough messages in society that teach us to be aware of and sensitive to the different experiences other people have lived through.

I hope you don't feel as though I'm shaming you, and I hope I don't come across as condescending to you: I just really felt like something had to be said. If you can, please pass the message along to D."

I'm just gonna copy paste from my blogoblog about something I took issue with from the internetosphere.
Big trigger warning for the ableism

That makes me feel really, really awful inside. :l I hate this world.

Trigger warning for self harm and ableism

I think this hits me so hard because it's just a more extreme version of what my dad does all the time. He's constantly explaining how hard it is to work so hard and have to take care of someone who does nothing. He's always telling me how hard I am to live with. As if I'm the one who has to understand. Like being mentally ill is a fucking cake walk just because I don't "have to work". I don't think my dad would ever wish that on me, but it's all part of the same ableist attitude that somehow having to deal with me is so much worse than me having to deal with own problems. There also seems to be the underlying assumption that if I just understood how hard it is for him I would magically start becoming more functional.