Fugitivus Discussion Forum

OK, thanks! Aromantic for me.

Oh yes.

I have full consensus on this, even though some parts of my mind would like to become closer to more people. It's kind of like a guardrail in front of a cliff: Some people want to go to a lower altitude, but they don't want to jump off the cliff.


I should have mentioned that - this whole system relies on the fact that I have the best set of parents. They never push my boundaries, they never mistrust me, and there aren't even any power dynamics between them any myself. I have no idea what I would have become if I'd had *shudder* normal parents (and I guess when I say that I'm really thinking "normal middle-class parents" because that's what I'm familiar with - I'm not sure "middle-class" describes my family, but it certainly describes most of the people I went to high school with, and those are the people whose parents I've heard about or met. I'm not sure a middle-class household without abuse can be considered "normal", are you?).


"Aromantic" is a parallel term to "asexual", except for romance instead of sex. It describes a person who does not experience romantic attraction.

I don't know if there's any good term for abstaining from romantic activity. Maybe we should invent one?

I will be a romantic abstainer and celibate, as far as sexual contact with others goes. As for what I experience, romantic attraction or sexual attraction wise, I cannot predict that. I just know the boundaries I am going to set on my behavior. Since I have never been asexual by the definition above in the past, I don't expect I will be in the future.

That's a very good analogy. I'm glad you can be comfortable with your boundaries, and that your parents can respect them.



So much 'yes' on this one. If you really look around, all the "normal" people are really dysfunctional. Perhaps no more dysfunctional than me, but I seem to retain my self-awareness and compassion despite being messed up.



All right, that sounds like a plan! I'm sure you have more experience in this area than I do (I've only had one serious relationship in my life), but I'd like to share this: After I left my boy, I felt a really big absence, like I used to have extra senses and then suddenly my world became two dimensional again. HOWEVER, as time went on, I reclaimed more parts of myself that had been banished because they didn't match my partner's traits. So hopefully you'll be able to reclaim parts of yourself, too- if any were lost- and use that time to get to know your needs and desires better.

That was written so well! I hope I do get to know my desires and needs better.

Oh, and thanks, Llencelyn, I guess, since I was the one who took the correction / clarification on my language gracefully, I hope!

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