Fugitivus Discussion Forum

PTSD is a really complicated diagnosis. I wouldn't sweat the DSM-IV classification part of it unless you're doing coding for insurance reimbursement. I do think it's important not to cloud mental health with slang (e.g. saying you have PTSD from an exam at school because it was simply challenging) but I think if past experiences that were emotionally or physically threatening are impairing the ability of someone to cope with / adjust to stresses and interactions in one's life in a debilitating way (including flashbacks), go ahead and claim it.

Oh, and the therapist's reaction to your complaining about your past making you feel guilty and needy? So wrong. I had what I think was a similar situation with more than one therapist - one said she didn't feel comfortable discussing my verbally and emotionally abusive relationship with my husband if he wasn't there to give his own point of view, so she could only talk to me about my own behavior. Huh?

It wasn't the past, exactly, it was the present. She said it in an inoffensive way, but I still couldn't help but notice it. I can see why she'd say I was selfish, because I was talking about how much it bothers me when my mom asks me to do things- things I do despite being stressed out by being asked. But the other time I was complaining about how my mom is always talking to me and trying to get my attention and how I feel it's needy, and she said, "Are you perhaps needy yourself?" Maybe she was trying to catch me in projecting, I don't know. But it feels like, in a way, she's trying to protect or defend my mother.

Oh, that's terrible. Therapists should never do that. Alice Miller says she is always on the side of her patient, and I think that's really necessary in therapy. You can't really work with someone who doesn't even believe what happened to you really happened.

Yeah, that's a whole level of what the hell with the 'your abuser must be here to give their point of view' stuff. I've only ever been able to get use out of therapy because the therapist was, by definition, solely engaged in actively listening to the things I have problems with. Constructive criticism of a thought pattern or behaviour - fine. Telling me I need to give credence to people who are engaged in making my life hell - noooo way.