So, I think what's happening here is that we both know the gist of what happened, but are focused on the specifics.
I think each of us a specific focus on this post:
Basically, I feel like saying "you weren't raped. You intentionally, truthfully, voluntarily consented. You could call the douche a douche but he didn't commit rape."
I didn't read to the end before I made my first comment, so I'm going to reply again to tell you that this is never, ever, EVER ok. And posting something like this, even as a hypothetical quotation, even with the qualifier that you KNOW it's probably not appropriate, even in the 101 board, in what is pretty much tantamount to a rape survivor group?
All I'm saying is I'm judging you pretty hard right now.
You focus on what you quoted from Kulantan; I focus on your stating that you're "judging ... pretty hard right now". I think we're ENTIRELY agreed on the rest of the thread, and that it's overall a good and educational thread. I just think that your post above is harmful. It DIDN'T kill this thread, but on just about any other forum, or in any actual conversation, it would have. Kulantan never actually SAID the sentence you call out - if he had, I wouldn't arguing against your reaction. He posed the sentence as "So, this is what I'm initially feeling, and I know it's wrong, but...can someone help connect the dots for me?"
But hey, you're free TO judge, though! If someone's even capable of formulating that sentence, I can see why you'd be a bit upset with them. But Educate Me is not a place to make people feel bad that they don't get it; it's a place to help them get it. It can also be a place to point out that "When you do x, I think y about you", but your post was far more aggressive.
I think the problem/solution discussion can be applied here. The rest of these forums are a safespace - the problem when rape apologia appears there is the violation of the safespace. The goal is to maintain the safespace, so calling the behavior out or moderating it with extreme aggression accomplishes that goal. In Educate Me, when rape apologia appears in the context of "I think this, but it's wrong and help me", the goal is to correct the behavior and educate - aggression isn't going to accomplish that.
I see where you're coming from here, but again, I think this is society having a narrower view of a word than what the word actually encompasses. You say you don't feel entitled, but you asked again after you were told "no". Your horniness outweighed your partner's lack of verbal consent - now, you asked again instead of just saying "whatever, I WANT IT AND YOU WILL GIVE IT", but at the same time, you were not content with an answer of "no" and you decided not to settle for it, suggesting a feeling of entitlement.
When I think entitlement, I think of a feeling of deserving or being owed. When I was asshole who required three or four no's to get the point, I had a feeling of wanting my partner to also want sex. I didn't think I deserved it for being her boyfriend or was owed it because she was my girlfriend. (Picture a kid stamping their foot obstinately until they get ice cream; that's my mental picture of entitlement.)